When a baby comes into the world, the older brother may feel in different ways. You may feel excitement, excitement, and even fear when the parents come home with your little brother, but what you feel most inside is that your world, the one you knew until then, is crumbling. He falls apart because he will no longer be anything like the same because the attention of his parents will no longer be exclusive to him.
But just because the little one’s world falls apart does not mean that everything is bad … sometimes, the older brother begins to mature. Maturity is acquired throughout the growth of a person, depending on their experiences and lived circumstances. In some children, their maturity comes earlier, depending on their genetic predisposition or personality, but we will focus on when the baby comes home.
The world falls apart.
Yes, the world falls apart for the older brother, but he will also begin to have other positive aspects over time: he will think more and better because now he is the oldest, he will be more independent, he will do some tasks more maturely than other children his age … But it’s critical for parents to keep in mind that now is a critical time for their older child.
It is a critical time because you may feel isolated or misunderstood. When the older brother realizes that the baby receives more attention than he does, then jealousy can appear. Jealousy will make him behave in a different way; perhaps sometimes it seems as if he were smaller than his age at home to receive attention … An older brother can process this situation in different ways, we will tell you!
When a baby is born, the older brother can take different positions in the face of this event that has changed the lives of him and his entire family. For example:
- You can be happy and mature sooner. He can mature thanks to the treatment he receives from his parents, since they continue to be by his side and also, they give him more responsibilities because now he is the older brother.
- Perhaps he rejects the brother because he sees him as the intruder of the family or as a direct competitor for the love and attention of his parents. In this case, jealousy will appear, and instead of maturing, there will be an obvious evolutionary regression. You will desperately want to regain lost attention from your parents.
How to avoid jealousy
It is necessary for parents to take all of this into account to avoid jealousy in the older child towards the younger, and instead of this, they can stimulate positive maturity. To achieve this, follow these strategies:
- Do things with the older brother without the younger brother’s presence from time to time. It is good that I have individual time with Mom and Dad. This will make him see that he is still just as important to you.
- Involve your child in homework and do it like a game. Try to make those responsibilities that you want to give him fun and attractive to him. These responsibilities have to be positive, do not look at the faults he may have, and turn these situations into opportunities to show your trust towards him.
- Do not lose communication with your child and talk about emotions, things he likes … do things as a family and alone with him. You need to feel cared for at all times.
- Do not impose emotions or empathy. Respect her rhythm and feelings, so don’t impose empathy on her social skills. It may be difficult for you to put yourself in the shoes of your younger brother because of jealousy, but what is necessary is that you be able to identify, express, and manage your emotions, and then, you will also do it with others. Do not pressure him to understand others and less if he is not able to understand himself.